Wednesday, May 13, 2009

My House Arrest

I’ve been asked why I was placed under house arrest and is it related to my demon-hunting profession. No, it’s not related. It is related only to… well, nobody in the Royal Family will read it so I can be quite frank.
I was arrested simply because half a year ago I married the right person. The right person for me, of course. My dear friend and soul mate, my fellow demon-hunter, the most gentle and brave man – Urmas Constantine Root. Somebody would ask: what’s the deal?
The deal was that Urmie is the last direct descendant of one of the three First Konungs (the founders of our state) – Olaf the Just, Ruler of the East Shores. That’s not a crime, that’s an honor. The Root family always carried their heritage with pride and always remembered that they’re a “Family of the Just”. I really loved Urmie’s parents – too bad they passed away three years ago – and they always loved me, even if my family lineage is many ranks below theirs.
But being such a noble prince apparently is a dangerous position when Konung Anund (descendant of Karl the Brave) and Queen Oda (descendant of Ule the Wise) don’t have any male heir, only three daughters. So Prince Urmas became the logical choice for a dynastic marriage, despite all his “shortcomings” – he’s not a court person but has a real job (demon-hunting), he doesn’t pray to the official Pantheon of Nurthic Gods and he doesn’t like either of the three princesses and, especially, Princess Sigrid, which the Konung selected for his bride. The Konung tried to persuade and pressure Urmie but he refused and married me instead in a simple ceremony in the Root family castle.
Then all hell broke loose… No, if that had happened, we two experienced demon-fighters would know what to do. But the Konung went berserk, he declared my husband a Criminal of the State and an Enemy of the People, nullified our marriage, and tried to arrest us. Being afraid that the two of us would become an easier target to catch – we separated and for several weeks avoided capture (nice honeymoon we had, right?). Unfortunately, one day I was too careless and got into the Konung’s net of spies. Then I was shipped to Aldeyborg, our capital, and now am held under house arrest, under the never-ending surveillance of the Konung’s personal guards. He needs me as bait hoping that my husband will come to my rescue.
Too bad, this idiot on the throne doesn’t know that we’ve agreed before going into hiding that if one of us were captured – the other would go abroad at least for two-three years, waiting until the Konung’s anger died out. Thus, the situation right now has no immediate solution: I’ll sit in this house, my husband will live under a false name somewhere in Vinland, Holy Mississippia or somewhere even farther, and the Konung will look for another suitable fiancé for his ugly and hot-tempered daughter. Unless, of course, something unimaginable happens (like demons stealing Princess Sigrid, say…hey, they’re not so stupid as they would have to fear for their own safety, if she gets near them) and me and my husband would be asked by the Konung to help. Oh well, it’s always nice to dream.

1 comment:

  1. What a sad story and what a stupid king! Being a Royal employee I can only imagine what a pain in the bun a bad monarch can be.

    I told your story to my boss, Mr. Tainnik, the director of Lukomorian Royal Secret Service, and he became very interested. He said that we could give you the refuge in our country and offer you a job in our Service. Not that you should send your resume but think about it.

    With intra-world travel magic we can steal you from under noses of your guards (just imagine Konung's face when he'll learn of your disappearance). Just imagine this scene! So warm!

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